The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
My dick has a subreddit
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize