Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
