My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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