Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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