I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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