dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
