She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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