Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
