Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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