Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize