I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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