The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
