you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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