haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
