its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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