Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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