Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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