I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
