Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize