can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize