my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize