can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
