If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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