"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
