I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize