Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
