Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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