so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
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