I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
