you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
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I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
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it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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