i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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