best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
now i know why i became what i already was.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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