glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I haven't been this sober since birth.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
