can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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