I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Dick very happy bro
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
