I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
