what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
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