a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
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