Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
