I bet he comes in French.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize