Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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