I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
