I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
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