While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
