What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
