Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
