somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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