I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
