did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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