what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
