its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
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Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
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